The End of Solitude

The concept of loneliness has transformed over the years and even decades. If you look up the meaning of solitude the response that appears is the state of being alone. The end of solitude by Dr. Rick Bair discusses the fact that the world has changed and our concept of being alone will forever be different from what it was before. After reading this I realized that this has even been an occurrence in my life and it’s easy to see the difference from when I was a child and now.

It doesn’t take a lot to remember my childhood and it certainly isn’t hard to spot the differences between children then and children now. When I was young, my form of entertainment was playing outside in all weathers and seasons. TV wasn’t a big part of my life and I would watch it only for educational purposes and some movies occasionally. When I couldn’t find something to entertain me, I entertained myself. I used my imagination and made up games, new rules and ways to distract myself from boredom. My friends were a big part of my life but only those whose houses I could walk to and knock on the door to see if they were home.

Today, children are surrounded by electronics from the day they’re born. They are being raised to only know how to live with technologies. Playtime used to consist of making up games and using your imagination when you were bored and now when a child feels bored they watch TV. Even babies have iPads that they play games on and interact with. Younger and younger children every year are asking for and receiving cell phones in order to text their friends and new technologies like iPods are enabling this too. This gives children the same exact thing as texting but for free through apps. When I was a child I wasn’t allowed to go on the computer when no one was home. Now everyone from age 8 to 100 is on social media sites like facebook and twitter. The way children are connected this day and age is way different from even 10 years ago. They’re learning that they don’t have to be with someone to interact and gain attention with others around them. Popularity isn’t just who’s sitting at your lunch table anymore, it’s how many friends you have and how many likes you get that determine who’s cool.

I don’t know if I could live a day in solitude. This reading talked about how the thought of being alone for some people is unsettling and looking back at my recent experiences it is. Even when I first arrived at college I was terrified to be alone. I settled that fear by texting my friends at home, making sure I still felt a connection to someone even if it wasn’t in person. I was nervous that I would ever have to eat by myself in the lunch room and calmed those thoughts with knowledge that I could still have texting and the internet on my phone if worse came to worse. Even when I’m alone in my room or going to bed I find myself not truly alone. I am still texting those around me or on social media sites, staying connected.  I have a constant stream of contact that I believe may be impossible to stop. My phone has become a safety blanket for me and without it I feel lost and with no texts I feel alone.

I can honestly say that I know what it’s like to be on both sides of this. When I think of my childhood the words stress-free and relaxing comes to mind. And now that I think about it, it is not only the fact there were less responsibilities and nap time was the worst part of my day but also because I knew how to be alone. I could sit in my room and play with my Barbie’s by myself for an hour and see nothing wrong with it. Today I am constantly connected to those around me and I don’t know how to live without it. In a changing world like ours, how do you learn to be okay with being alone when all you’ve ever known is how to connect with others?